I live with this pain

You’ve thought long and hard about the wrong you’ve suffered. You relived that moment so much, haven’t you? You know it like you know how it feels to come home when the day is done. — The crumbled rocks under your feet that now feels like coarse sand, the spiders in the doorway as you unlock the door. The rushing relief when finally get inside. — You know it from the gut, but not enough to leave and never return.